A THOUSAND CROSSINGS X

Dear Diary...
Fruitful, definitely.
dimanche 16 août 2009

It was wayyyy tiring today. But fruitful. Most definitely.

This weekend felt weird and unproductive, because my parents have both left for Malaysia to visit my grandmother who has fell. And this weekend I only managed to do 2 years worth of Physics MCQ from the ten-year series, 1 A math paper one, 1 biology worksheet and 3 geog questions.

But I still felt that the weekend was fruitful. 'Cause i did a lot of thinking. Yes, thinking. [classic INFJ behaviour]

Especially today. (we'll talk about that later.)

Let's talk about my grandmother first.

My grandmother had a fall on Thursday, 2 weeks ago at a temple. My dad, upon hearing the news booked tickets for the Friday morning coach. He came back on Thursday, and left again on Friday! I was like, oh am gee! Yeah, So I didn't get to see much of my dad recently ): I miss my dad, and more importantly, that travel shaver we share. rahh. My dad took the shaver away.

Dad had to leave again because grandma had a hip fracture and needed an operation. They needed to insert a metal bracket to support her hip. So yeah, my dad had to go back to collect the bracket.

I was like.."What? COLLECT THE BRACKET? YOURSELF? FROM THE POST OFFICE?" I was like really shocked.

Then my dad was like, "Malaysia is like that..."

Then I cracked a joke that the hospital was a budget hospital after my dad said that it was a 'free hospital'. "Dad, I heard of budget airlines and budget hotels. But this is the first time I have heard of a no-frills budget hospital! Like what, 'you want a bed? rent it for five dollars a night!' 'you want a pillow? 2 dollars!' 'you want a blanket? 2 dollars' 'you want the doctor's attention? ten dollars!' " My parents laughed really hard when I said that. Although the hospital is not that bad as to even make you pay for the doctor's attention, it really is a budget hospital. LOLs. Budget healthcare.

But I really think that the hospital's protocol is quite ridiculous. Making my dad collect the 'delivery' It seems pretty stupid. My mum said,"What if someone fell down and has no relatives? he has to limp or crawl to go collect his order?" That was quite funny too. And a quite possible situation. I really wonder how that hospital works. Ridiculous budget healthcare. I don't trust them, honestly.

Next, today! This weekend has seriously been unproductive because I did not manage to start on revision and finish my tuition homework. Oh wells. Today was quite fruitful. Did math, went for Chinese, then rushed to Kovan to meet Mr Tan at the scholars' hostel, Mr Tan is staying with the hostels. (shit. did I say Mr Tan is staying with the HOSTELS? I must be dreaming. I meant that he stays with the scholars.) to prepare for tomorrow's O level English Oral Examinations. We waited for a really really really long time. But it was quite worth it.

Mr Tan felt that my reading today was below par, cos I was low on energy. I wasn't surprised, considering the events that had preceded the revision session. Anyway my conversation was good, as usual. (: Love it. Still band one despite my bad reading. YESH. I CAN SMELL THAT A1. COME TO ME!

And today, I realised that Toon Yang and I shared the same thinking for religion and life. which is quite cool. Both of us are freethinkers, but we do believe in reincarnation (Egyptians and Buddhism), and then we also believe that all the deities and gods and goddesses co-exist and all. haha! It's quite cool, to actually find out someone believes in the exact same way as you. (I see toon yang in a different light! haha)

Although I often say, "Why bother about life after death when you still have got life before death to deal with?" But often, when I think about my future, I think of death. I often wonder if I will just cease to exist. Like the moment I die everything just blacks out and u literally cease to exist. Like, u live only once. We're nothing but phosphorous, calcium, carbon, hydrogen and oxygen pieced together. Or do we have inner beings that continue to live?

But then that leads to another question. That what are these inner beings? Do they die? How did they originate? If they control personality, does that mean the future and current personas you have will have the same personality? You know you know what I mean?

Confusing and scary. That's the essence of "Life is pleasant, Death is peaceful. It is only the transition that is troublesome." What's gonna happen? I don't know. :/ I guess the concept of life and death is far too difficult for us to understand. That's because we don't know. We don't know.

But I really hope there's reincarnation! haha. Will I be an animal? haha. But me and Toon Yang actually wish to be of the opposite gender, now that we have already tried being boys. haha. But then again, if there really is reincarnation, we might have been women, horses, dogs in our past lives already. Haha.

Life and death. Funny. Scary. Universal.

English Oral tomorrow. Wonder how it'd be.

Au Revoir

yongliang

he closed his diary at {20:19}